Let me get back to you, will ya, Charlie? I got a guy on the other line asking about some white walls.

so the theme song for yesterday would have been 'caught stealing' by jane's addiction. lemme explain...
i have officially joined the ranks as 'one of those guys' and am now a part of a church softball team. sweet. check another thing off of my to-do-to get-old list. anyways, we were playing last night and i was a little stressed out. i haven't thrown a ball in years and had to spend a good part of saturday afternoon trying to get some muscle memory back so i wouldn't flat out embarass myself. so throwing is not necessarily the problem. i made a pretty decent throw from the outfield and mad a double play so i was getting pretty stoked. not cocky, just stoked. so get on base with this brilliant alice of a hit a la ichiro suzuki. the rule in softball is that you can't lead off until the ball leaves the pitcher's hand, and there is no stealing. easy enough. i was reminded of this from every guy on the team individually. so i beat out the soft dribbler and end up on first base my first at bat. nice. now i'm out to get a couple of bases to make up for my weak hit. so i take off as soon as the pitch leaves the guys hand, and the next thing i know theyre throwing me out at first. i got picked off at first in a softball game. i didn't think it was possible, but i proved them all wrong. and managed to quench a much needed rally. seriously, the only thing i can remember thinking was that it was a fat pitch and i was sure our guy was going to going to nail it. evidently some guys like to take a pitch. i'll keep this in mind for next week. anyways, it was really embarassing to play softball again, but i think i'm gonna have to join the crew and just laugh at this one, and keep my anger reserved for off of the field.

this got me to thinking though, and i think i've alwas been an anti-competitive person. probably because i've never been much of an athlete, but have always enjoyed playing. actually, my anti competitiveness probably goes back to the nintendo days when dantheman used to beat me at every video game we played. my mom never bought me a nintendo so i could never practice to beat him, so i just got it in my mind that i don't care about winning. thanks mom. just kidding, i actually used to be somewhat competitive, i just get frustrated when people stop having fun with sports, and when people turn everything into a competition. at this point, i would rather play catch, or throw the football around with my friends than try and get an organized game together. either that, or come up with some sport like gennis or my fave, calvinball, where no one really has to be the loser.

the pinnacle of this was our D2 basketball team in college. as much as it was a joke, it really had an underlying purpose to put some fun back in intramurals. i remember guys during basketball would get so worked up over games, and they forgot they were playing in D league, and the final score would be somewhere in the teens. the worst part, a lot of guys, including guys from our club seemed to forget that we were all christians. when D2 came in fruition, we made it a point to lose every game, fouling out if necessary, but bringing the focus back on having a good time and esp goofing around. we had guys playing in wheelchairs, we had one short guy on another guys shoulders with a jersey over the both of them. i think a bear suit was involved, and i def remember the game we all wore cheerleading outfits. (sidenote: while i'm not one to condone or participate in wearing women's clothes as a regular or comedic practice, this also served a purpose of clarifying that men should not wear skirts. also, if you're not scottish, it's not a kilt, it's a skirt.) whatever... we had fun and we had more people show up to our last game then most of the varsity basketball games. we were all winners. that was the whole point.

it's one of the things i stress with my kids in the youth group a lot. this whole idea of winning and competition translates into so many other things that drive people. one of my peeves is the whole one-upper attitude that drives so many people into fits. seriously, we don't have to have the best story, car, excuse, ticket... whatever. i know competition can be healthy, but that doesn't mean we should step on other or stress ourselves out trying to be or have the best whatever.

moving on...
it's hard to not enjoy today. the new jack johnson cd came out, so i've got some sweet mellow tunes to go with the cool breeze that's flowing through my office. i've got most of my work done with getting the retreat ready, so the next few days are details, minor details. the chica i met the other day at lunch called me yesterday. i don't think she was too impressed that i was a religious guy, but we'll see. whatever, the sun is out and it's a gorgeous day here in simi valley. i went skating this morning for a little while in the neighborhood across the street from the apts, had a good conversation with lawdog, the preacher here, ate lunch with one of our elders, and have a free evening to go do whatever i want. nice. oh yeah, i started a dynasty with sdsu on ncaa 05 last week and i'm playing in the championship in my second season with them. and finally, i've got that good sore feeling that comes from throwing too much, and a jitter in my hands from hitting the batting cages yesterday. real nice.

in random thought news...
when i get old, i'm going to make sure that i'm not just talking about my health issues. i love eating lunch with one of our elder's here, but i'm not to keen on hearing about strokes, bowel obstructions, or coughing up blood right before lunch.

being good at church league softball is like the movie bull durham. sure, you're great at church league softball, but there's always the question... why aren't you playing somewhere else? that's why having fun is more important.

every guy should have some reason to own a pair of cleats.

i can think of a billion other things i would rather watch than all of the fashion reviews of the oscars. thank goodness for dukes of hazzard on dvd.

the cello is my new favorite instrument. not sure why, but i think it is due in large part to this jack johnson song with a cello in the background that sounds awesome.

i was finally able to listen to a song and play it on guitar. this is a big deal for a guy who plays guitar all the time to battle his inherent tone-defness. unfortunately that song was 'lose yourself' by eminem.

there should not be a reason for the word celebutante.

i'm going outside to play.

one love, one heart.