2.26.2008

kim jong il vs. joe strummer

kim jong il vs joe strummer

is it just me or is it possible the kim jong is a fan of the clash?

a few months ago i started listening to classical music on a pretty regular basis. it's great for studying, background music, and going to sleep. tonight i was channel surfing for a while before i started to doze and i came across a classical concert on cnn. i stopped surfing for a minute to see why this was news, and saw the headline across the bottom of the screen; "new york philharmonic performing in pyongyang, north korea". this is huge. i was excited to watch because these kinds of things have the potential to change history. this is the largest group of the first song that i caught was 'an american in paris' by gershwin. when the conductor was introducing this masterpiece, he made a comment that he hoped one day someone would write 'an american in pyongyang'. i couldn't agree more. the best part of the comment was that the north korean audience applauded in response. they are brought up to believe that we are an evil empire, filled with hate, so for them to applaud that statement gives me hope that someday we can be at peace with this country. i know there is a long way to go in attaining peaceful relations with north korea, but if that road can be built by visits from the nyc philharmonic instead of the us military i think we would all be better off. that's not a dig against our military, but rather a dream that we can achieve our goals through something as universal as music. i think music has the power to save the world. in the early 1970's different musical groups were allowed unprecedented access to china, and several years later the entire country was opened up to the west. in africa, groups of former children soldiers are rallying people against violence that has shattered their country for years.
i know it's easy to get stuck in the rut of listening to whatever 3:33 that gets fed to us by the labels. but for my money, the best music out there is the music that is honest, earnest, and dangerous. johnny cash ended his career with a song about God's vengeance, james brown began his career with songs about racism, and tonight i'm watching a group of new yorkers play on the other side of the korean border. it makes it all the more meaningful for me to end with...
one love, one heart.

2.22.2008

" Who are you, John Locke?"

so here's the predicament that i'm in. there's a lot going on with different people in my life right now. i would love to divulge all of the details on each situation and write about what's going on, but a few of them read this, and a few would probably be hurt or upset by what i would write. so as much as this blog was intended for me to be a place to be completely open and honest, i feel apprehensive about sharing the whole truth. my intent was never to hurt feelings, but to share mine. so you'll have to forgive me if this post seems a little more hidden than usual. i hope you can appreciate though, that this blog was originally intended for me to be able to look back and see what i was thinking at a given time.

anyways, here it goes.

person a: watching someone so close change so much is both a pleasure and a pain. feelings of envy are overcome with pride in watching you move on.

person b: i don't have the courage to say that this is pointless, and there's a huge wall that is fast approaching. if i had half the courage that i wanted i would say no now.

person c: i'm glad that we've become close, and i'm very glad that you're a part of my life, and i hope you understand why i have to be a little bit apprehensive.

person d: a simple phone call from you would do so much. i don't have your number right now and i'm waiting to see how long it s before you figure that out.

person e: there are so many reasons we are close, and every time i'm around you i am reminded that God has blessed me with some great people in my life. the ability to go back and forth between sharing jokes and the stuff that rattles our souls is something that i hope continues on as we grow older.

person f: while you may not get the attention you deserve, i have always admired your ability to stay steadfast in life's storms. so many people look to me as an example and i look to you.

person g: i know there are times where we wish we could throw a switch and go back in time to better days. my prayer is that the times we do spend together you know how much you mean to me.

person h: it's been a weird experience meeting all of the people you've introduced me to.

person i: i need to be more honest with you.

person j: i miss having you around all of the time. i wish that our relationship didn't just consist of stories in the past. but you will always have a piece of my heart.

person k: i wish i didn't want what i can't have.

person l: your faith amazes me. just when i think i've got it you go and say something that blows me away.

person m: i don't trust you. there are not a lot of people in my life that make me feel that way. you have tarnished a part of my life that i want back. all that said, i think i could forgive you if you were big enough to own up to what you've done.

person n: the constant gossip is getting to me. stop it.

person o: i've let you down so many times and you still come back. that means a lot to me. thank you for the patience and tolerance that you teach me.

person p: oh what could have been.

person q: oh what never will be.

person r: i'd be lying if i said i didn't think about you every day.

person s: one of these days i'm going to stop ignoring you, and let you be a big part of my life.

person t: the fact that i can even talk to you without my jaw falling on the floor is a great feat.

person u: i hope that our paths cross sooner than later.

person v: we shouldn't hang out anymore, i don't think it's good for either of us.

person x: you have so much to offer, and i hope that you continue to realize that there is a God that loves you so much, and i do too.

person y: you have completely changed my life, and i can not thank you enough for what you have done for me. i think it's okay that we don't have to say what what we feel out loud. sometimes what's unspoken is better left unspoken. deep down you know how i feel, and what the time comes you'll get the thanks you deserve.

person z: stay cool and have a nice summer.

i hope if you're reading this you don't assume anything. this was just an exercise to say some things that have been on my chest for a while. they're just little reminders of the good, bad and ugly things that are going on right now. it feels good to see this in front of me, and i'm sure in some way it's saved me a couple of hours in therapy just vocalizing what i feel. well, my other computer is finished processing some video stuff so it's time to get back to work.

one love, one heart.

2.14.2008

ALF: "I mean, this is about as interesting as-- as listening to a John Tesh album."

hola hola hola. i wrote this last night but our neighbors are irresponsible and didn't have their wireless network on.

so i stayed home sick today, and in between taking robitussin naps and multiple hot showers i managed to squeeze in some tv time. there is nothing worth watching on in the afternoons. i say this after deciding to watch things that i know i don't like to watch. i'm not sure why this was appealing, but i would venture to say there is such a thing as too much 'tussin.

i watched this 'classic' movie with kathryn hepburn in it first. at least i started watching it. i had to turn it off because i couldn't keep up with how fast she was talking. yesterday i had a better chance of deciphering the lyrics to snow's informer than i did of making it through a conversation in the philadelphia story. it reminded me of when mi hermana was in sixth grade and all of her friends would be over at the house and would inevitably end up talking at the same time. you want to try and listen, but the second you miss a sentence you're done for.

later i watched one of those court tv shows, where somebody was suing their ex girlfriend for damages to a black velvet painting. while i do not condone violence, lawsuits, or destruction of other people's property, i had to laugh when the guy started crying about how much the painting meant to him. the best part was not that the girlfriend owned up to destroying the painting (citing that it wasn't actually art), but that she refused to pay $500 for a painting that she claimed he bought for $5 at a garage sale. i wonder if the judge had this in mind while studying those long hours in law school?

next, i ended up watching one of those list shows on E!. i think it's the first time i've ever not channel surfed over something with the word 'starlicious' in the title. here's how you make a list show:
step 1: find something that a few people have done (in this case make-overs)
step 2: figure out how many people have done it so you know how long to make your list (25)
step 3: find two pictures and use every transition know to man to show the same picture over and over. (i personally like the zoom in and move across the picture method best)
step 4: repeat step 3 (as many time as possible)
step 5: get comedians you've never heard of, and that one guy/girl who used to be on that one show to talk about the subject.
step 6: add cool graphics and you're good to go.

i dozed off for a little while, and when i woke up the tv was on the korean home shopping channel. it was then i discovered that i had been laying on the remote.

so i turned to espn and watched the clemens hearing for a little while. i'm still going with innocent until proven guilty, but i really wish he would have cleared more stuff up today. (he may have, i'm going to read about it tomorrow with much less medication in me.)

i surfed channels for a while. i did a little rorshach-style-first-thing-that-comes-to-your-mind treatment for this.
80's music video channel: bring back jerry-curls!
food network: dang giada.
afternoon news: what did this person do to deserve the on location story at petco?
cspan: sweet, our government at workZZZZZzzzzzzz........
history channel: how many 'experts' are there on medieval shoes?
craziest videos shows: is every car wreck captured on video?
shopping network: sweet, topaz belt buckles!
oprah: today we're talking about depression. and as a special treat everyone in our studio audience gets a free RADIO SHOWERHEAD!
madtv: diet saturday night live
project runway: i should never tell anyone i watch this.

after another round of 'tussin, sleep, and hot showers. i went to the office to check my mail and get some fresh air. after a quick dinner i cleaned up some and read for the rest of the night.

i know there's nothing really noteworthy here, but i figure since i've never really read any other blogs about the crap on daytime tv i'd go ahead and put my two cents in. also, let this be a warning to you. never get sick. and never take a day off from work and stay at home and watch tv. if you do, make sure you have dvds, or things on dvr that you haven't seen yet.

one love, one heart.

2.05.2008

"Yeah, mind-bottling. You know, when things are so crazy it gets your thoughts all trapped, like in a bottle? "

and now we begin the time of year that the cuz and i call lent. it's the month or so between the end of football season and the start of baseball that we give up sportscenter. i might watch some in march to get an idea of who to pull for in march madness, but in all practicality, sportscenter is pretty useless right now. unless of course you are one of both people that watch wnba highlights. anyways, if you have any movie suggestions for us to catch up on this would be a great time to post them. it's also a good time to read a book, redesign a blog, weave baskets or wash your car.

superbowl.
considering it was between two teams that i can't stand (actually, i just can't stand eli manning) i was pretty stoked about this year's super bowl. it was tough to decide who to root against this year. on one hand, i can't stand anything boston, and i really didn't want their fans to have a perfect season that i would have to hear about forever. on the other hand, eli is a swear word to chargers fans, and the thought of him winning a super bowl on his first shot was not that appealing. in the end though, the thought of 18-1 trumped everything else. i'm very excited that they came so close to perfection only to fall apart at the end. i'm already planning on going to the chargers-pats game next season to watch a healthy chargers lineup dominate the pats. and as soon as he signs his contract, i'm getting a hold of a baby blue cromartie jersey.

nothing.
like many people, i've become conditioned to respond to the 'what's going on' question with a simple 'not much'. i was thinking about this a lot this past weekend, and how that is a total lie in my life. on any given sunday i have short conversations with at least 50 people, and this past sunday i caught myself saying 'not much' more often then i would like to admit. while i don't necessarily want to bore people with every mundane detail of my life, i should never have to resort to 'nothing' as a response to an invite into conversation. more importantly, i don't really want to live a 'nothing much' life. if someone is going to ask, i should be able to muser up something interesting to share. why not? am i becoming so busy that i simply don't have time to share? no. am i really offended that someone is asking about me? no. my best guess is that on some level i want to keep things on surface level so that they will stay on surface level conversation as well. it's like i'm purposefully trying to avoid contact. this is not a good thing. and i'm not saying that just because of my job, i really think this is something that represents a much larger cultural problem. we want to keep things on the surface. we want easy to clean, easy to fix, easy bake relationships with people. we don't want to know how the homeless guy is doing, we don't want to ear the story from the divorcee, we don't want to hear about that person's ex, because it forces us to take the focus off of ourselves and care about something outside of our little circles. i can't think of anything more contrasting to how Jesus operated than 'not much'.

so in honor of that last little rant, here's all the stuff that i have to choose from the next time someone asks 'what's going on?'
i'm getting back itnto gym mode.
my sister is graduating in may, and i'm relly excited to head out to abilene for that.
we're looking for an intern for this summer.
still finishing up the merry christmas madness video.
our calendar for the next few months should be up and posted sometime this week.
i just finished writing the drum parts to two of my songs.
i have a huge painting that i'm working on for my friends' youth group.
i'm also working on a logo for another church.
the presidential race is actually getting somewhat interesting with super tuesday tomorrow.
my website is still a few weeks from being up and running, but i'm already getting stoked about it.
a bunch of shops around here are having sales on snowboards which means i might be able to sneak a run in with a new board in the next few months.
i've been going back and re-reading a bunch of books that really shaped me a few years ago. this list includes: velvet elvis, blue like jazz, wild at heart, and how to win friends and influence people.

jack.
do yourself a favor and buy the new jack johnson album, 'sleep through static'. buy a copy for a friend too. it'll give you something to talk about.

one love, one heart.