Lemme show ya something! This is why you never put nitroglycerin in a chain saw. -Fire Marshall Bill

hola blogworld.

so yesterday me and fire marshall bill decided to head down to burbank and see the tonight show firsthand. pretty cool to say the least. anyone who comes to visit the l.a. are should take a day out to be part of a studio audience. it's not a mind blowing experience or anything like that, but it was really cool to see how the show is made. so here's my thoughts/observations on yesterday:

i have an increased respect for jay leno. he lives off of his earnings as a stand up comedian. all of his tonight show money either goes into savings, charity, or his massive car collection. he also wears a denim shirt and jeans everyday to work, and owns over 150 cars. most people change clothes every day and drive the same car to work. i got the impression that jay leno also treats every person equally, wether they are a tv star, some random schmuck, or the guy that does security for the stage. very impressive.

the studio spared no expense to redecorate the tonight show set with one exception, jay leno still has the $35 chair from office max that he has sat in for every show.

the stage for the tonight show is actually really small. the cameras have special lenses that kinda deceive the eye. very hollywood.

tom selleck is very short and he wears his pants up his chest like an old man. sorry to burst your bubble mom, but magnum p.i. prob wears black socks and sandals too.

there was a guy from pittsburgh in front of us in line that had me and fire marshall bill doing our best not to laugh. he starts going off on random stories, really random stories, and ten minutes into the conversation i realize that the window to tell this guy that there is a giant red thing in his teeth has passed. at a certain point, you just have to let that go and not say a thing, otherwise he's going to be really embarrassed, and my chance to enjoy an awkward moment would be over. needless to say i could barely look at the guy after a while and neither could fire marshall bill. had to be there i guess...

after the jay leno show, they asked some us to come watch the carson daly show, which we actually debated, but decided it was better than being in traffic. what a difference carson daly makes. anyways, that show was cool, but much less impressive than the tonight show. i think the biggest difference was the guy that came to warm up the crowd. the jay leno guy was funny, but never condescending, and he never tried to give us some false sense of importance to the show. all he said was, the audience at home will respond how you guys do, so please laugh when you think things are funny, and don't worry if a joke bombs. the carson daly guy was trying to tell us that we were 'an important part of hollywood'. right. and you don't say that to every audience. that, and he was a forty year old guy doing the trl yell every time we were supposed to be 'excited'. i typically don't consider myself cooler than most people, but i def have one guy beat. probably.

so other random people i've run into lately...

i was heading to a b-day party for valleygirl on monday night and i stopped off at the drug store to pick up a card. the couple in front of me were trying to buy a box of top ramen with some fake food stamps. the guy started yelling at the lady behind the register, and i thought he was going to get violent. so i interject my two cents, and comment that the gut shouldn't get mad at the girl just trying to do her job. if you're doing something illegal, don't complain when people don't go for it. 'nuff said. so the guy looks at me and yells, 'so what are you going to do about it?' so i put down a couple of bucks on the counter and tell the lady at the register to put it on my bill. the couple does not even say a word. no thank you. nothing, they just grab the box and head out. oh well, three bucks is a small price to pay to avoid a fight.

so later that night i'm down on sunset blvd for this birthday party. (not something i've ever been able to say before, and i only mention because it will help make the rest of the story make sense.) anyways, i got there an hour early because there was not a sign of traffic, so i decide to walk down sunset to kill some time, and give bulletproof chica a call, cuz it had been a while. so i'm walking down the street, and there's all these little hole-in-the-wall places with no signs that i never realized were there, and all of the sudden this car parks on the other side of the street and a guy in the car starts taking pictures of me. i don't have a clue who he thought i was, but it was unnerving to say the least. i can imagine how that could freak famous people out. not a cool feeling, but funny. needless to say i'll be checking the national enquirer for my pic.

then there's my favorite person of the day, the 'i'm a part of hollywood' guy that name drops like there's no tomorrow. i've ran into a few of these people before, they have a great sense of distorted perception. proximity does not equal celebrity. the very fact that you work in the same building as jay leno, does not make you a celebrity. yes, it's interesting, but if that's the greatest thing you've got going for you, it's time for a reality check. this guy took the cake though, because he wasn't even name dropping a person, but a car. 'Yeah, i was right next to a a brand new lambo, and this guy starts to rev his engine. i'm like, seriously, all i have is a camaro, i'm not gonna race your lamborghini. then, the guy stalls it when the light turns green and i beat him across the intersection. it was awesome'. please allow me to break down my response:
1. i find it ironic that the guy wasn't going to race until after he had won.
2. lamborghini's are impressive machines. no guy will argue that. however, i do think you must actually own one in order to call it a 'lambo'.
3. this guy was asking people that just came to see jay leno to also sit and watch carson daly. he did not fill his quota or the stands.
4. i can understand telling this story being told in the context of a conversation about cars, racing, or even nice cars that you might see around los angeles. i cannot even begin to grasp why this story was told without any prompting whatsoever.
5. everyone in southern california has seen a lamborghini. there are a lot of nice cars here. call it nice weather or whatever, its one of those peripheral benefits that comes with living here. that would be like me bragging to my roommate that i saw a house that cost a million dollars, or i saw disneyland from the freeway, or i know where the ocean is from here.

on to the more serious stuff...
me and the cuz watched 'Hotel Rwanda' last night. frustrating to say the least. obviously the hardest thing about the movie is wondering how a group of people could kill over a million of their fellow countrymen. i hope i never understand that. but something else struck me, why didn't we know about what happened? why didn't the u.s. take any action? the answer is pretty simple, the administration of the time chose to ignore the problem. i think it's ironic that the same people that criticize our involvement in other countries are the same people that allow millions of people to be victims of genocide. then i remember hearing about the 'ethnic cleansing' in romania, and somalia. so excuse me when i say i don't mind our involvement overseas if it means that we are preventing genocide. oh yeah, those are the same people that say it's okay to kill children. why am surprised?

and then today, i found out that most of my extended family, will have to evacuate their homes due to the hurricane heading towards houston. keep mi familia in your prayers.

well, i'm not one to end things on a downer, but it's been a real crazy week between the good and the bad. such is life, no more than we can handle.

one love and one heart.

oh yeah, in response to lindsy's comment on my last post, i did forget to mention the best thing about going to costco, the free samples! good call.


They say that the recipe for Sprite is lemon and lime, but I tried to make it at home, there's more to it than that.

kind of a random day, good, but really random. here are some of the things that have crossed my mind today.

why am i listening to bon jovi... again?

if you own a pizza place that happens to be on a street that will be closed for a parade, then no, you will not be able to deliver on that day.

i don't like country music, so i better find another way to categorize nickel creek.

if there is any official function for ministers, there must be a speaker. no speaker, no event.

every speaker must have an introduction.

every introduction must list off the things that qualify them to speak.

we had a luncheon the other day at pepperdine, and the 'host' listed the qualifications of the guy that was going to say the prayer for lunch.

i wish i needed to be introduced. my introduction would be, "speaking to us today is d.j. iverson, he's the youth minister from simi valley. he has a degree in graphic design and he's probably the only one here wearing jeans."

for the first time in a long time i am looking forward to the rainy season.

mountain dew is underrated.

so are hot tamales.

i'm 25 and i have a full time job yet i still enjoy getting care packages from my mom.

we had a dinner three weeks ago here at the church and i left some pots and pans here. we didn't notice until yesterday.

'taming a liger: unexpected spiritual lessons from napoleon dynamite' may be the greatest book i've ever read.

the great gatsby is definitely the worst.

lord of the rings IS better than star wars.

costco (or sam's club for the midwest) is a great place to do some people watching.

who needs five pounds of mayonaise?

what is the best way to send salsa to someone in another country?

the way i feel about 70's music is probably how most teenagers feel about 80's music.

old people always pay in cash.

if the retail value is $80, and you're trying to sell it in a grocery store parking lot for $20, no you are not cutting me a deal, you are trying to sell me stuff i don't need and/or want. and you wearing a suit and tie with running shoes doesn't help either.

well, that's about all i have time to ramble about today. things are pretty nuts around here, which shouldn't be a surprise to anyone that knows me, or anything about youth ministry.

one love, one heart.


Please, Damon is the biggest practical joker I know. He once convinced a sophomore that he was the middle Hanson brother

so i think this is going to be one of those 'stream of consciousness' type blog entries where i'm off on a bunch of tangents. that's cool, that's kinda how things have been lately...

so where to begin...

i love inside jokes. nothing makes for a better friendship than having an inside joke with someone. some of my best friends are people that i became friends with because of one joke. then there's a whole crew of people that i know that our whole relationship revolves around one joke. i'm not going to go on vacation to see them or anything, but if i ever do run into them again, i guarantee we'll bring our joke back up.

i know no one else will get these (the whole point of an inside joke) but these are some of my favorite inside jokes...

trashcanning and d.o.b.

tres grindage


congratulations dave and jessica

you turned that down for a pepsi?


old navy.... YAAAAAAAAY!

where are the urinals?

toss me an oreo. strike.

you know i don't speak sign language.

shtank you for shtoppng by the plateau taco time, would you like shome shalsha or shour cream? your total ish sheven shixty shix.

lane 6

ain't kiddin

there's the lawrence welk stand

812 dub tribe

han solo hair


the dirty dozen


ahhhh, there's so many more, but those are the ones i've been thinking about lately.

so what else has been going on...

i really need more of my friends from san diego to come and visit. bulletproof girl came to visit this past weekend and i was forced to get everything organized and cleaned up before she got here. def a good thing. aside from having an awesome weekend journeying around, staying up too late and people watching, i now i have everything organized as a result. add that on to the list of reasons why i'd like to see bulletproof girl again.

one thing we did was watch both of the ring movies, yeah... creepiest movies ever. (i so heart creepy movies... yeah, i know right). i promote a lot of movies, and typically they're not of the horror genre, but if you're one of the two people that haven't seen both movies yet, i highly recommend watching them as soon as possible. but not with me, i make jokes to cover up the fact that i'm actually pretty creeped out.

one of the things a youth minister always has to wonder about is wether or not they make an impact on their kiddos, and wether or not they feel comfortable with you. yesterday i got a little present to show how much the kids care. i've been planning on redoing my office here as soon as the time and money are available at the same time (i.e. not the couple of days around when rent is due). anyways, a couple of the girls in my youth group decided to go ahead and redecorate for me. 'an obsession with hanson' wasn't really the theme i was going for, but i did get a big kick out of walking into an office literally covered in hanson posters, magazine cutouts and who knows what else. they did a good job, and it must have taken them a while, but there will be repercussions. i need to show them how much I care. it was also funny, that while i was buying some shoe polish and other accessories to get them back, they walked into the grocery store. so i payed quickly and quietly, and tagged their car while they were picking up a snack. not the best work i've done, but considering the situation i had a pretty good laugh. oh it has been broughten.

i made another little realization yesterday. if we eat out a fewer times each month, me and the cuz could easily afford a much larger and nicer tv. i'm not one to need the latest and greatest toys, but i think i've gotten bit with the tv disease, and sony is thy name. we'll see. there's no big rush, except that after going to best buy the other day our tv at the apt seems oh so small and unentertaining. first priorities first though, i need to recover financially from giving up half a paycheck to our church for hurricane relief. seriously, if anyone in this country hasn't stopped by the red cross or a local church or something, do it right now.

which leads me to some more serious stuff thats been on my mind. i am absolutely sick and tired of people complaining about the government's response to the hurricane victims. some idiot the other day was comparing this disaster to the 9/11 response and made themselves look like a total idiot in my book. when an entire area is flooded, it's going to take time to get aid in. when 9/11 happened, there were only a few square blocks affected (not to discount the impact of the disaster) but people were physically able to respond because of the proximity. as for katrina relief, i can understand why people are frustrated and confused, but to start shooting at relief helicopters and loot your town as a response is absolutely uncalled for. it's one thing to be in desperate need to get your baby food, diapers, water, shelter and other necessities, but when i see a bunch of people pushing a display case of nikes down the street there is a line of decency and understanding that has been crossed. that is someone else's livelihood that you are stealing, and using a disaster to say that these are 'owed' to you because of your struggles is absolutely insane. for so long, certain political leaders have preached that it is the responsibility of the government to take care of our every need, that we have lost the ability to take responsibility for our own actions. we are not 'owed' anything by our government if we do not take the responsibility to contribute ourselves. if anyone is 'owed' anything, it is the thousands of volunteers that got off their butts to help others. it is the countless number of nurses and doctors who, being flooded out of house and home themselves, start taking care of those around them in line waiting the arrival of organized help. they are owed a thank you. they are owed a peasant night's rest knowing they have served their community and their neighbors. the ironic thing is, these are the people that never in a million years would ever ask, demand, or put together a news conference to draw attention to their actions. if i were a new orleans resident i would be ashamed of my mayor, and i would have every right to feel that way. his comments, and those in his corner have distracted our attention from the true victims, and are blatant political grandstanding. yes we know there are thousands that may have died, and there are hundreds of thousand that are without homes, and your city is in ruins, but criticizing the hand that literally feeds you is uncalled for. this is one of those catch twenty-twos that responsible leaders have to deal with when grandstanding opportunistic self-serving press conference mongers get involved. no matter what you do, it will never be the right thing. people are complaining that relief isn't coming soon enough, but if relief had come even a day earlier people would have been complaining that it wasn't very organized. get it through your head, you are owed nothing. the fact that relief is on it's way at all is out of sheer compassion of others. it is because our forefathers set up a government that would take care of it's own people (and others around the world in need) to the best of it's ability. does this mean everyone in new orleans will get a new flat screen tv, no. but it does mean that any and all victims that can get help will, to the best of our country's ability. in no way, shape, or form am i trying to criticize those who are tired, lost and have nothing but the clothes on their backs. i can't begin to imagine the amount of suffering and distress that this hurricane has caused, but i will call out the political leaders who prey upon victims for their own political gain. typically i don't like to call out names, but jesse jackson is at the forefront of my mind so often when it comes to these tragedies, and it makes me wonder, what does he do when there aren't any disasters? does he encourage the naacp to help any white victims of the flooding? does he encourage anyone to help out with hurricane relief or does he complain about it? has he served a meal without a camera around? how much of his salary has he donated to relief? what does he do for a living?

ugh. it stuff like this that makes me mad. even my own attention is taken away from the hurricane victims and pulled to the hurricane criminals. i'm infuriated. i may also rethink buying that tv. i think i may have to take a break and go back to some inside jokes.

Dear God,
I know it's so hard to understand your plan sometimes, but i see so much potential for your glory to shine in the wake of this disaster. i praise you for guiding the hearts of so many that are risking their lives, and using their time and energy to help their neighbors in need. i thank you for those that are working tirelessly, and selflessly to find the lost, reunite families, serve and prepare dinners, drive busses, fly helicopters, organize finances, make decisions, and anything else that is being done to serve. bless them Lord, and give them strength to continue to serve beyond disaster relief. let them know it is You who served us first, and we are just following your example. i pray for all the victims of this disaster, that they may lean upon your word and compassion for support, and that they know that You are God. i pray that new orleans is no longer known as a city of debauchery, but a city of service and compassion, where your light shines. i pray that those using this time for personal gain would to distract our country from serving and caring. Lord, let this disaster be a firing point for your servants everywhere to be called into action, whether it's time in prayer, financial support, or physical labor.

much better.

onto other things...

so everyone pretty much knows that i'm a music nerd and all that, but i was kinda struck by some songs the other day. i made a bunch of comp cds of my favorite songs for my truck, and there was a group of songs that played in order that kinda had some cool messages, at least they did for me...

welcome to paradise-
i really am happy with my life and where i'm at as a person. i have a job i love, people that care about me and plenty of stuff to laugh about.

welcome to the jungle-
and yet i live right over the mountains from one of the most insane places in earth

what do i get-
that's my question too often. i'm always looking out for what i can do to earn things. instead i should be asking...

what i got-
i don't take stock of the blessing i have often enough

what's golden-
what has value in my life? do i have any idols?

what's my age again-
i love this song. one of the reasons i became a youth minister was so that a part of me would never have to grow up.

whats up-
not so much a message here, but i love how a cheesy song can be so fun to sing along to and play on guitar. that, and sometimes it just feels good to stand up and yell 'Hey-ey-ey-ey, Hey-ey-ey, What's goin on?'

when i come around-
i wonder what it would be like if i actually used all of my potential.

when it's good-
'when it's good it's oh so good, and when you're gone its gone' taken out of context, that makes a very nice spiritual statement.

where is my mind-
i seriously get distracted by so many things other than what i should be focusing on.

where is the love-
(yes, i like BEP) always a good question to ask yourself in any given situation. am i acting on love?

where the streets have no name-
i can't wait for the day.

yes i know that these are in alphabetical order, which is the easiest way for me to keep track of my music, but that's besides the point. i like how a simple random section of song titles can bring up so much thought.

well, after a weekend of hanging out with bulletproof chica, and a true couple of days off i feel energized and ready to get to work. keep me in your prayers cause we have a lot of stuff coming up, and i'm thinking of taking a significant increase in my responsibility in my leadership role in the church. speaking of, we are looking at different things we can do to improve worship service on sunday mornings, so if your church does something that really works well i'd like to get some outside ideas. thanks.

one love, one heart.